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 What would you get ...
Topic Originator: onandupthepars  
Date:   Sun 25 Nov 19:06

our players and manager for Christmas?

FAISS - a lightweight stepladder he can cairry aroon' an' deploy in an instant tae reach high balls.

LEE ROBINSON - big sticky gloves.

ANDY RYAN - radio-controlled legs, so we can make him belt the ba' when we need him tae.
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 Re: What would you get ...
Topic Originator: Hummingbird Harry  
Date:   Sun 25 Nov 19:22

Fass - a goal
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 Re: What would you get ...
Topic Originator: onandupthepars  
Date:   Sun 25 Nov 19:26

HIGGY - a bucket o' ice cold water for his heid when it starts heatin' up too much .
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 Re: What would you get ...
Topic Originator: nick_dafc1  
Date:   Sun 25 Nov 19:28

AJ - Tactics for Dummies
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 Re: What would you get ...
Topic Originator: eastendalloapar  
Date:   Sun 25 Nov 19:31

P45s.

matt forsyth
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 Re: What would you get ...
Topic Originator: onandupthepars  
Date:   Sun 25 Nov 19:38

FOR ALL OUR PLAYERS - A clean bill o' health and match fitness.
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 Re: What would you get ...
Topic Originator: wee eck  
Date:   Sun 25 Nov 19:49

That's a good suggestion, onandupthepars. Apparently Ryan, Connolly and McCann all picked up injuries through the week.
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 Re: What would you get ...
Topic Originator: 1970par  
Date:   Sun 25 Nov 19:58

[Post Deleted] - Reported as abusive
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 Re: What would you get ...
Topic Originator: mach1  
Date:   Sun 25 Nov 20:08

On the basis that this is a light hearted post, I'd get all the players the AJ book of tactics.
For AJ, I'd get some lining material for the inside of his pockets; they must be worn out by now.
And for Sandy, the instructional book on how to throw the ball up for the shooting in routine in prematch warmups. It's probably available in used paperback format from Amazon.
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 Re: What would you get ...
Topic Originator: PARrot  
Date:   Sun 25 Nov 22:13

Thick skins to put up with the garbage folk on here say about them.

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 Re: What would you get ...
Topic Originator: HalbeathRoad  
Date:   Sun 25 Nov 23:09

Quote:

mach1, Sun 25 Nov 20:08

On the basis that this is a light hearted post, I'd get all the players the AJ book of tactics.
For AJ, I'd get some lining material for the inside of his pockets; they must be worn out by now.
And for Sandy, the instructional book on how to throw the ball up for the shooting in routine in prematch warmups. It's probably available in used paperback format from Amazon.


Watching our shooting practice before games is absolutely horrific. If you sit in the Norrie you have a good chance of being scudded.
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 Re: What would you get ...
Topic Originator: mach1  
Date:   Sun 25 Nov 23:46

It's sad I know, but I sometimes try to keep a mental score of shots on target vs misses.

It's not good most weeks.

In fact as a percentage, it is probably better during the games when they do try some shots.
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 Re: What would you get ...
Topic Originator: AlfonzoBonzo  
Date:   Sun 25 Nov 23:52

Goalie. A bungee cord. Keep that lad in some sort of proximity to the box

Show us yer....
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 Re: What would you get ...
Topic Originator: onandupthepars  
Date:   Mon 26 Nov 01:39

That's a gid ane Alfonzo.

Nice tae see a wee bit imagination comin' intae it.

Even though what you said is kinda negative Mach 1, it is funny. Just shows it's not what ye say so much, it's how ye say it.

So we've got Lee Robinson on a bungee cord, wi' giant gloves.

And I suggested on another thread Mrs Doyle wi her tea trolley at centre forward.

Somebody's workin' Andy Ryan's legs by remote control.

and Faiss is standin' on a step ladder waitin' for somebody tae punt the ba' on es heid.

We're gettin' it sorted!
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 Re: What would you get ...
Topic Originator: onandupthepars  
Date:   Mon 26 Nov 02:01

FOR ALL OUR FORWARDS a magic perfume: "Dobbie" by Max Goals Factor



NO THAT ANE - THE ITHER ANE !



Post Edited (Mon 26 Nov 02:23)
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 Re: What would you get ...
Topic Originator: onandupthepars  
Date:   Mon 26 Nov 02:21

WHAT IS STEPHEN DOBBIE'S SECRET?

According to the Daily Record:

5 OCT 2018

"He’s averaging more goals than Kylian Mbappe, Robert Lewandowski, Lionel Messi, Eden Hazard. Sergio Aguero and Ronaldo.


So what’s Stephen Dobbie’s secret?

The veteran Queen of the South striker reckons it’s fairly straightforward - he’s one of the last of a dying breed; a street footballer who honed his skills on the mean streets of Barlanark in Glasgow. "

source: https://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/sport/football/football-news/stephen-dobbie-reveals-secret-behind-13361703



So there you have it - get our lads oot for a kick-aboot on oor mean streets, tae "hone" their skills.
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 Re: What would you get ...
Topic Originator: mach1  
Date:   Mon 26 Nov 08:03

It's clear from reading that whole interview that Dobbie has a great work ethic and a love for his current club.

He's also competed at a much higher level when getting back to back promotions to the EPL with Blackpool and Swansea.

Not a surprise that he has been doing so well.

Don't think he'll get his wish of QOS in our top league though, but most things are possible with the right attitude.
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 Re: What would you get ...
Topic Originator: onandupthepars  
Date:   Mon 26 Nov 09:45

Sometimes it can help if there's someone who inspires you. Dobbie should be an inspiration for any forward. What about our own past players though - any forwards that could inspire the current ones ? Somebody with a great work ethic and love for the club?
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 Re: What would you get ...
Topic Originator: mach1  
Date:   Mon 26 Nov 09:58

Craig Brewster certainly had good work ethic on the field and in training.

Big Norrie loved the club and was inspirational.
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 Re: What would you get ...
Topic Originator: Berkey  
Date:   Mon 26 Nov 13:00

A striker with intelligence, anticipation and positioning making up for veteran age. Very much like Brewster. Chooses the right option more often than not.

Oh to have a striker with even one of those right now. At least Keena will be back for sat.

Just sitting here drenched in my own negativity!
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 Re: What would you get ...
Topic Originator: onandupthepars  
Date:   Mon 26 Nov 15:13

Of our past forwards, Brewster came to mind straightaway for me as well. But could you say he loved the club? Was he a Pars man through and through?
Lieshman is the epitome of that isn't he? Have we had any very successful forwards who you could say were Pars through and through? Bert Paton? (63 goals in 144 appearances - pretty good).
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 Re: What would you get ...
Topic Originator: AdamAntsParsStripe  
Date:   Mon 26 Nov 16:29

Quote:

onandupthepars, Mon 26 Nov 15:13

Of our past forwards, Brewster came to mind straightaway for me as well. But could you say he loved the club? Was he a Pars man through and through?
Lieshman is the epitome of that isn't he? Have we had any very successful forwards who you could say were Pars through and through? Bert Paton? (63 goals in 144 appearances - pretty good).


I would say John Watson , even if not an original fan certainly became one playing with us.
Harry Melrose too and Bert as mentioned.

If you only turn up to moan then do it elsewhere
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 Re: What would you get ...
Topic Originator: SeasonedPar  
Date:   Mon 26 Nov 19:02

Big Brew’s head to stick on Faiss’ neck
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 Re: What would you get ...
Topic Originator: onandupthepars  
Date:   Mon 26 Nov 19:18

Sorry - boobed again - the 63 goals in 144 appearances Bert scored were only league games (source Wikipedia). Pars website says he scored 88 in all, including seven in europe, the club record. He would have had more but broke his leg twice.

Harry Melrose, 106 goals in 275 appearances, including six in a 10-1 win against Partick and:

"Three of Harry's 106 goals were scored in European competitions, the most important of which was the goal 3 minutes from time, which knocked Everton out of the 1962/1963 Inter City Fairs Cup. Running on to a 50 yard defence splitting pass from Willie Cunnningham, Harry took the ball in his stride, and coolly ran in on goal to slot the ball past Gordon West in the Everton goal." (I can see it in the mind's eye - that's how they used tae do it)

John Watson - it took him 17 matches to find the net - (Faiss has got time yet) -
"an inspiration to supporters and team-mates alike" - played a big part in getting us from 2nd division (third tier?) to Premier. 85 goals. "Still hugely popular around EEP." (source Pars website).

Thanks for giving me a nudge to look these up AAPS. Reminds me how good were some of the players we've had.



Post Edited (Mon 26 Nov 19:22)
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 Re: What would you get ...
Topic Originator: onandupthepars  
Date:   Mon 26 Nov 19:26

Ref: SeasonedPar
Mon 26 Nov 19:02

<<< Big Brew’s head to stick on Faiss’ neck>>>

Sounds good tae me. (And an opportunity/ request for Widtink to do some of his photoblending wizardry? 😂)



Post Edited (Mon 26 Nov 19:28)
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 Re: What would you get ...
Topic Originator: Angus_W  
Date:   Mon 26 Nov 21:09



There are sections on tactics & substitution.

🔩 ya 🚀
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 Re: What would you get ...
Topic Originator: OzPar  
Date:   Mon 26 Nov 21:15

AJ - A taser that automatically sends an electric shock to our manager at the 60 minute point, and every two minutes thereafter until all substitutes have been utilised.

:)
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 Re: What would you get ...
Topic Originator: eastendalloapar  
Date:   Mon 26 Nov 22:33

My Infiniti Q50 car was previously driven by Jack Ross as part of a sponsorship deal. I would let AJ get a shot of it if it helped to improve our season in the same way that Jack Ross improved St Mirren.

matt forsyth
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 Re: What would you get ...
Topic Originator: onandupthepars  
Date:   Tue 27 Nov 20:07

Eastend, that's worth a try, but how would you get AJ to drive your car?

SCENARIO: three o' ye's wait wi' the Q50 til AJ is about to arrive at EEP. Before he can see it, put it across the middle o' the road.

As AJ is arriving, two o' yous help the other oot o' the driver's seat o' yer car and say to AJ - "The driver's havin' a heart attack - could ye get his car oot the middle o' the road, the keys are in the ignition. And while yer at it take it for a spin, there's nae hurry."

For FAISS: a copy of Harry Melrose's brain, so that when he's playing he can use Harry's experience, and along with his own skills, bag some beauties!



Post Edited (Tue 27 Nov 20:13)
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 Re: What would you get ...
Topic Originator: eastendalloapar  
Date:   Tue 27 Nov 20:13

I'll try to concoct the plan when I'm in Marvs for lunch on Friday.

matt forsyth
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 Re: What would you get ...
Topic Originator: onandupthepars  
Date:   Tue 27 Nov 20:32

That's it.
Marv - she'll know what to do - a woman's intuition. Plus a nice cup o' tea and maybe some others to help hatch the dastardly plot.



Post Edited (Tue 27 Nov 20:46)
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 Re: What would you get ...
Topic Originator: onandupthepars  
Date:   Tue 27 Nov 20:40





Post Edited (Tue 27 Nov 20:52)
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