DAFC.net
Home 28 March 2024 
 Post Message  |  Top of Board  |  Search  |  Log In   Forum Rules  |  Newer Topic  |  Older Topic  |  end 
[ please login to use the Like feature ]
 Sex for old folk
Topic Originator: onandupthepars  
Date:   Tue 29 Oct 00:34

...Like me and my wife.

In cafes my mum used to straightaway announce to the waitress, 'He's vegetarian.' (Sort of like, 'excuse him, he can't help it.') I wonder if now it'd be, 'He's got erectile dysfunction.'

Well anyway it's true. So I tried different types of pills. They give me nasty headaches and some hardly work at all. I was wondering about these oils and gels you can get to rub on the 'wee lad.'

Maybe you've heard about a friend with the same problem? Any advice?

Next time I'm in the city, I was hoping I might get something from a sex shop, I don't feel I could trust the Net.



Post Edited (Tue 29 Oct 00:54)
[IP address logged]
Report Abuse   Reply To This Message
 Re: Sex for old folk
Topic Originator: PARrot  
Date:   Tue 29 Oct 05:40

Neebs.....at our age sex is fur pit'n tatties in!

This actually got me in the mood. I just asked the wife if she fancied some super sex.
She asked me whit kinda soup!



Post Edited (Tue 29 Oct 05:42)
[IP address logged]
Report Abuse   Reply To This Message
 Re: Sex for old folk
Topic Originator: EastEndBoy  
Date:   Tue 29 Oct 07:53

Quote:

onandupthepars, Tue 29 Oct 00:34

...Like me and my wife.

In cafes my mum used to straightaway announce to the waitress, 'He's vegetarian.' (Sort of like, 'excuse him, he can't help it.') I wonder if now it'd be, 'He's got erectile dysfunction.'

Well anyway it's true. So I tried different types of pills. They give me nasty headaches and some hardly work at all. I was wondering about these oils and gels you can get to rub on the 'wee lad.'

Maybe you've heard about a friend with the same problem? Any advice?

Next time I'm in the city, I was hoping I might get something from a sex shop, I don't feel I could trust the Net.


Like playing pool with a rope, eh?

...ken?
[IP address logged]
Report Abuse   Reply To This Message
 Re: Sex for old folk
Topic Originator: jake89  
Date:   Tue 29 Oct 15:03

I think you can get Viagra over the counter now. Only concern would be all these stories you hear about folk left with permanent hard ons! I'm assuming they did something wrong for it to react in that way.
[IP address logged]
Report Abuse   Reply To This Message
 Re: Sex for old folk
Topic Originator: widtink  
Date:   Tue 29 Oct 15:22

Quote:

jake89, Tue 29 Oct 15:03

I think you can get Viagra over the counter now.

^^^^
Im pretty sure there's a joke in there somewhere 🤣

Admin
[IP address logged]
Report Abuse   Reply To This Message
 Re: Sex for old folk
Topic Originator: LochgellyAlbert  
Date:   Tue 29 Oct 16:14

Aye, they can't get the coffin lids on!😎🤪
[IP address logged]
Report Abuse   Reply To This Message
 Re: Sex for old folk
Topic Originator: onandupthepars  
Date:   Wed 30 Oct 00:09

Thanks for all the laughs folks. I'm gonna tell that super soup joke next time I'm at the Men's Shed. It took me a couple o' minutes to get the one about playing pool with a rope, still makes me laugh.



Looks like Rocky's got the same problem.



'Now that's a banger' Peter Andre posted after his girlfriend accused him of having a miniature dangler.

Yes even the financially well-endowed can be bit short of the necessary.

https://www.thesun.ie/tvandshowbiz/1867960/peter-andre-hits-back-at-rebekah-vardys-comments-that-his-penis-is-the-size-of-a-miniature-chipolata/


I wish I could get some o' that dodgy Viagra mentioned by Jake89! When I use it, it has a quick rush of blood to the head for about five seconds then gives up the ghost.

Anyway me and my wife still have plenty of fun together: I just don't post any letters these days, all deliveries by hand. Keeps us close and happy. I recommend it for any oldies instead of giving up.



Post Edited (Wed 30 Oct 09:18)
[IP address logged]
Report Abuse   Reply To This Message
 Re: Sex for old folk
Topic Originator: LochgellyAlbert  
Date:   Wed 30 Oct 10:12

Watch out for the cramps!!!😲
[IP address logged]
Report Abuse   Reply To This Message
-
 Re: Sex for old folk
Topic Originator: onandupthepars  
Date:   Wed 30 Oct 14:52

Yes it definitely gets funnier as you get older!
[IP address logged]
Report Abuse   Reply To This Message
 Re: Sex for old folk
Topic Originator: Luxembourg Par  
Date:   Wed 30 Oct 16:15

Ask your doc to prescribe caverject ;-)

[IP address logged]
Report Abuse   Reply To This Message
 Re: Sex for old folk
Topic Originator: Milos Drizzle  
Date:   Wed 30 Oct 20:11

I am now seeing your username in an entirely different light, onandupthepars ;-)
[IP address logged]
Report Abuse   Reply To This Message
 Re: Sex for old folk
Topic Originator: jake89  
Date:   Wed 30 Oct 20:30

Can get those pills in the chemist oneandup. They're called Viagra something. They're advertised on the TV.

On a more serious note, it could be related to high blood pressure or being overweight. Worth getting a checkup.
[IP address logged]
Report Abuse   Reply To This Message
 Re: Sex for old folk
Topic Originator: onandupthepars  
Date:   Thu 31 Oct 01:20

Thanks Jake, I've had an MOT and passed alright. I guess it's just something that affects some folk and not others. Some folk are still climbing Mt Everest and running marathons at my age. I think they've got very good genes. And maybe done more of the right things as well. I've no complaints.

How about you? Judging by your name, maybe you're just a youngster? If so, I'd say do everything you want to while you're young.

Milos,
I never thought of that. I wonder if it's having a subliminal effect. I'll have to log on more often!

Luxembourg,
I've just googled caverject. I've heard of someone who injected himself. Seems to work well for him. I also heard of someone who uses a kind of vacuum pump? I think me and my wife are happy to stick to 'willie and the hand jive' for a bit yet.

Cue Johnny Otis:




https://youtu.be/TEeeGMpM_Nk?t=40

https://youtu.be/Xrdjxj3lMD0?t=5



Post Edited (Thu 31 Oct 01:35)
[IP address logged]
Report Abuse   Reply To This Message
 Re: Sex for old folk
Topic Originator: jake89  
Date:   Thu 31 Oct 07:29

I'm fine, thanks. Always been tempted to see the effects of those tablets though. 😉
[IP address logged]
Report Abuse   Reply To This Message
 Re: Sex for old folk
Topic Originator: onandupthepars  
Date:   Thu 31 Oct 14:29

Hi Jake,

I've used prescribed Viagra (made by Pfizer) quite a few times. It has worked well most times , gave me a real good feeling after about half an hour. Not a boner but about half way at best. Lately it has only worked one time out of three. I knew another guy in his 70s who used it and it worked very well for him. he was probably fitter than me.

I've only used prescription stuff. But I was in an Ann Summers shop and the woman said 'we've got 'herbal viagra''. I don't know if that's different to prescribed stuff . I didn't get any because I'd still rather try a gel. They had one but it wasn't one I'd seen on the list of top ten erection gels on the net, so I didn’t get it.

I've also had two other kinds of pills on prescription - Sildenafil (made by Sandoz) and Tadalfil (trade name Cialis). Tadalafil has the benefit that it lasts for ages, about 24 hours! I was having to take it about two hours in advance. But the headaches were intense and I felt hungover for two or three days.

If you haven’t tried Viagra I’d say, give it a go. Probably best to ask for it on prescription or maybe you can get it over the counter at a chemist now? (Might be best to ask the Pharmacist or doctor if it'll be safe for you?)
If you can get Tadalafil on prescription it’s worth a try. If I had any left I’d take it and to heck wi’ the headaches and hangover. I think general fitness matters – I need to get fitter.

With the pills I’ve tried, none made my sergeant major anywhere near as good on parade as he was in my youth. The pills were good for me for a while but now they all give me headaches and hangovers, I’m gonna stick to ‘au naturel’, unless I find something better.



Post Edited (Thu 31 Oct 17:03)
[IP address logged]
Report Abuse   Reply To This Message
 Re: Sex for old folk
Topic Originator: onandupthepars  
Date:   Thu 31 Oct 17:08

I forgot to say, another down side of pills for me was that it makes the 'organism' less tickly. Mind you, I remember when I first got Tadalafil, the pharmacy woman said her husband uses it and 'it's really good'. So it's maybe all down to the individual.

Wish somebody could recommend a gel or oil and a reliable supplier.



Post Edited (Thu 31 Oct 17:34)
[IP address logged]
Report Abuse   Reply To This Message
 Re: Sex for old folk
Topic Originator: EEP  
Date:   Thu 31 Oct 23:16

[IP address logged]
Report Abuse   Reply To This Message
 Re: Sex for old folk
Topic Originator: Thaipar  
Date:   Thu 31 Oct 23:16

There is an Indian made gel called Kamagra. The Thais use it a lot and sold almost on every street corner in tourist places of Thailand. Might be able to order online. Costs about 1.50 per sachet so it might be worth looking in to.

[IP address logged]
Report Abuse   Reply To This Message
 Re: Sex for old folk
Topic Originator: onandupthepars  
Date:   Fri 1 Nov 01:38

Thanks Thaipar. I'll follow it up.
[IP address logged]
Report Abuse   Reply To This Message
 Re: Sex for old folk
Topic Originator: onandupthepars  
Date:   Fri 1 Nov 01:58

Ref: EEP
Thu 31 Oct 23:16

<<< Honestly only on .net that folk admit they can’t get a stiffy?😅😅 >>>

Our club is LGBT isn't it? Now it's LGBTO (oldies too). Free sex counselling on dot net any time you need it EEP. Don't be bashful.😅



Post Edited (Fri 01 Nov 02:31)
[IP address logged]
Report Abuse   Reply To This Message
 Re: Sex for old folk
Topic Originator: AlfonzoBonzo  
Date:   Fri 1 Nov 06:47

I’m glad I came on this thread

Show us yer....
[IP address logged]
Report Abuse   Reply To This Message
 Re: Sex for old folk
Topic Originator: GG Riva  
Date:   Fri 1 Nov 08:48

I don't know if any of you know how these Viagra type products initially came about and I'm not talking about how they were initially synthesised to dilate the blood vessels in folk with high blood pressure.

Soldiers in the French Foreign Legion often experienced "long and painful erections." Eventually, it was discovered that this was due to a substance found in a species of frog found in the local area, which the soldiers were fond of eating. The substance was identified, synthesised in the laboratory before being mass produced.

On a tangent, men who eat too much Spanish chicken will end up with big boobs because they are fed a diet high in oestrogen, so they grow to a good size in 6 weeks. Quite alarming, eh? 😃



Not your average Sunday League player.
[IP address logged]
Report Abuse   Reply To This Message
 Re: Sex for old folk
Topic Originator: average white par  
Date:   Fri 1 Nov 10:56

Brings a whole new meaning to the phrase "chicken breasts" doesn't it...?

Looks like it's prawns for me tonight...

[IP address logged]
Report Abuse   Reply To This Message
 Re: Sex for old folk
Topic Originator: onandupthepars  
Date:   Fri 1 Nov 13:28

I've googled Kamagra. Seems it's not licensed in the UK (i.e. it's illegal) so I wouldn't risk getting it.
[IP address logged]
Report Abuse   Reply To This Message
 Re: Sex for old folk
Topic Originator: parsmad68  
Date:   Fri 1 Nov 14:20

I did hear of a guy that used the gel stuff saying it was great but couldn’t stop pointing for a week.
[IP address logged]
Report Abuse   Reply To This Message
 Re: Sex for old folk
Topic Originator: onandupthepars  
Date:   Fri 1 Nov 15:18

Ref: GG Riva
Fri 1 Nov 08:48

<<< Soldiers in the French Foreign Legion often experienced "long and painful erections." >>>

Should've left the camels alone !
[IP address logged]
Report Abuse   Reply To This Message
 Re: Sex for old folk
Topic Originator: onandupthepars  
Date:   Fri 1 Nov 15:22

Ref: AlfonzoBonzo
Fri 1 Nov 06:47

<<< I’m glad I came on this thread >>>

Not sure if there's much more can be said about that Alfonso except I wish it'd have the same effect on me!
[IP address logged]
Report Abuse   Reply To This Message
 Re: Sex for old folk
Topic Originator: 1970par  
Date:   Tue 12 Nov 16:15

I asked my doctor if he could possibly prescribe a quarter of a Viagra tablet daily

He said that would probably be ineffective and why would I want that dose?

I said I just wanted to stop wettingon my shoes
[IP address logged]
Report Abuse   Reply To This Message
 Re: Sex for old folk
Topic Originator: OzPar  
Date:   Wed 13 Nov 11:10

Sex for old folk?

Oh yes, I remember sex.

It was a Tuesday... August... 2003.

:)
[IP address logged]
Report Abuse   Reply To This Message
 Re: Sex for old folk
Topic Originator: Buspasspar  
Date:   Tue 19 Nov 16:54

onandupthepars

Go to your local chemist and ask for mycoxaphlopin tablets

We are forever shaped by the Children we once were


Post Edited (Wed 20 Nov 18:53)
[IP address logged]
Report Abuse   Reply To This Message
 Re: Sex for old folk
Topic Originator: onandupthepars  
Date:   Sat 23 Nov 17:34

Ref: Buspasspar
Tue 19 Nov 16:54

<<< onandupthepars

Go to your local chemist and ask for mycoxaphlopin tablets >>>

You nearly got me there Busspass. I just started to write it doon, got as far as myc 😅😅😅



Post Edited (Sat 23 Nov 17:36)
[IP address logged]
Report Abuse   Reply To This Message
 Top of Board  |  Forum List  |  Threaded View   Forum Rules  |  Newer Topic  |  Older Topic  |  end 


Rows: 0
 Forum List  |  Need a Login? Register Here 
 User Login
 User Name:
 Password:
 Remember my login:
   
 Forgot Your Password?
Enter your email address or user name below and a new password will be sent to the email address associated with your profile.
Security : type 'pars' in the box:
email:
© 2021-- DAFC.net