To my friend, Jordan ~ from Buffy

To my friend, Jordan ~ from Buffy

25/04/2020

Today would have been our last home match
With the Jags taking on the DA
But you were to skip the fitbaw
As you had a much more important day 💕

I’d have text ye the score and the team sheet
And taken a pic of a pie
Parstv is in meltdown
And blown a gasket high into the sky

The overseas fans are in uproar
“Is oor expert away furra slash?
The players are fuzzy and all over the place
All we can see is the grass!”

Yer team are scrambling fur Scotland
Desperation has filled the air
The dongle has gone oan the laptop
So I’ve been drafted in as the spare!

Twenty two pairs of legs in ma view
I blushed as they waved to oor group
Giggles ensued and I forgot hauf their names
Ma purse went flying and we had a scoor-oot

The expats left in their droves and
The gaffer went white as a sheet
Ma career as a commentator at an end
You’re invaluable Jordan - it’s your seat.

It wisnae ma fault we got beat J
Nor dropping the headphones fae height
The gravy fae bridies all over the flair
Nor the fact that oor team were just ..... rubbish 😉

This is just a wee ditty to make you smile
Look back and remember in time
I know you’ll be thinking of the days to come
Everything is going to be fine.

The birth of your beautiful Abbie
Making her lovely mummy so proud
How you’re still standing is beyond me 💕
Your Pars family love knows no bounds.